For most of my life I looked at my experience of being bullied as a robbery of my childhood. I didn’t think it was fair that for 3 years of my life, I lived in fear, anxiety and, most likely, depression, from the ages of 13–16. It undoubtedly was the cause of the debilitating anxiety I experienced later in life, and caused so much pain for my parents who struggled to know what to do with their young son that seemed to be completely lost in life.

But looking back, I now realize it was a gift. It was a…

“Where fear is, happiness is not.” — Seneca

I was sitting down to watch a movie with my fiancé when, out of nowhere, an old friend I hadn’t seen in years paid me a little visit. A friend who has taught me more about myself than anyone else but who’s presence I typically fear rather than welcome. That “friend” is called anxiety.

This visit hit me out of nowhere and knocked the wind out of my sails. I had gone a long period of time without feeling those anxious sensations I had become accustomed to many years ago and felt…

2020 is a year I think most people will be happy to see the back of. Covid, forest fires (at least in California), simmering tension and anger. I would consider myself a positive person, but this year has pulled out all the stops and tested my resolve!

It’s been close to a year since I saw any of my family or friends in-person, my fiancé and I had to cancel our wedding, I’ve likely inhaled enough smoke for a lifetime after close to a month of constant forest fires, and the tension associated with the US election has been difficult…

Kevin Russell

Lover of life because of the struggle.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store